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Traveling with Children

8/24/2012

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A couple weeks ago I traveled to Chicago and took my children with me. It was a great trip! We had so much fun making some great memories. But traveling with children has not always been fun for me. Let's face it, traveling with children can be hard. I remember traveling with my ex when we just had one child and I would stress out so bad that my hair would fall out in what seemed like handfuls.

Before we started having children, he often complained about children in public, and especially about children on planes. It was like nails on a chalkboard listening to him. So when we had our own, the thought of traveling with him drove me nuts. The last thing I wanted was for our daughter to get sick or cry on the plane and give him something to complain about. I really should have been more worried about my daughter's comfort for her sake rather than his.  

Then when I became single the thought of traveling and doing everything myself was overwhelming.   That is when I decided to always take someone with me when I travel. But let's face it… that is not always possible. The people around us are not always able to drop what they are doing to go play with us. So I had to learn how to do it all myself and I have learned some tricks along the way to take the stress out of traveling with children. Here they are: 

1.  Make a list of what needs to be packed in each person's bag.  Start this list about a week before so that as you go through the week you can add things you forgot. Better yet, create the list on your computer to use over and over again. 

Split the list into two sections. On one side of the  sheet, put items that you can pack at any time. (I typically pull these items  aside into a pile as I pull them out of the dryer as I am doing laundry. On the  other side of the list I put items that get packed at the last minute. Things  like toothbrushes, medicine, and favorite toys.

Once your children are old  enough to read the list, they can start packing for themselves and all you have  to do is go through the check list with them when they are done to be sure you  approve of the clothing they have chosen. (My youngest loves to pack nice  clothes for camping and camping clothes when she needs dress up  outfits) 

2. Even at a young age, encourage your children to pack their own  backpack of things to do while traveling. This could include snacks,  dolls/stuffed animals, small cars/trucks, coloring or reading books, or small  electronics. Just make sure that they chose quiet toys to help you and the  people around you keep your sanity while in route. Last but not least, teach  them to carry the pack themselves.  

3. Leave early and give yourself plenty of time for potty breaks.  How quickly we forget that their bladders are much smaller than ours. If you  feel rushed you will be tempted to tell them to hold it which can lead to  accidents and cost you more time because now you have to clean everything up.  By the way, if your little ones are still young enough that they have accidents, make sure you pack their bag at the top or put a change of clothing in their backpack for easy access.

4. If you are going on vacation and you can avoid  agendas or schedules, I highly recommend it. As a parent we spend so much time  rushing from one thing to another (soccer, piano, dance, gymnastics, martial  arts, school, work... you get the idea). Vacation should be a break. A time to  do whatever makes you happy... Not stress you out.  So plan some activities but don't set a time to do them or a time limit.  If you do have to schedule things, make sure the schedule is flexible so that if you are having a lot of fun you can enjoy what you are doing just a little bit longer.

When my girls and I leave the house for a trip, they know that if they ask me  what time it is the answer will be "vacation time".   

5. If you are planning on going somewhere you  have never been before I highly recommend you search the internet for deals on  attractions.  Citypass.com has  some GREAT deals on select cities.   We took advantage of it while in Chicago and basically for the price of  admission to two attractions, we had the option of going to 5 different  attractions.  So our goal was to  hit at least two of the attractions just to justify the cost of the books.  Luckily, we  were able to hit 4 of the 5 attractions available to us.   Not too bad for a three day trip. 

As you are searching the internet for things to keep you entertained, don’t forget to  look at the times everything is open.   This is a mistake I almost made in Chicago.   After buying the city passes, we found that almost everything on the pass  closed between 4:30 and 6:00 pm.   This limited what we could reasonably get to but also opened up the door  to see other sights in the evening that we were not planning on like Navy Peer and the fun water  taxi ride that we took to get from one attraction to  another. 

6. Look for hotels that cater to children.  Many hotels have deals where kids stay  and play or stay and eat free with a paying adult.  This is true of Snowbird here in Utah.  That is why the last two summers we have taken a mini  vacation (one night) up the canyon to enjoy Oktoberfest at Snowbird where we enjoy free  rides on the tram, a great meal at one of the resort restaurants, and all day  activity passes for all the fun things they have going on.   It is a great way to save money and create lasting  memories. 

I want to hear from you. How do you create great memories while  keeping your sanity when traveling with  children?
Snowbird Ropes Course
Snowbird, UT - Ropes Course
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Make Better Use of Time Outs

11/11/2011

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Monday night I went to my mother’s house for dinner and after dinner we started watching “19 Kids and Counting”.  I am not sure how many of you watch it but I find this show intriguing.  I struggle keeping two children in line but they have 19, plus another on the way, yet it seems that their children are so well behaved.  One thing that struck me as I was watching it is that neither Jim Bob nor Michelle ever feels the need to yell at their children.  In fact, in last night’s episode they were allowing viewers to ask questions and they were answering them. 

One viewer asked a question about discipline and time outs and Michelle said that she does use time out but not because the child is in trouble.  She tends to use it as a way to calm the children down.  In other words, she will put her children in time out as soon as she sees them getting overly excited, and prior to them doing something they would get them in trouble.  This does two things: 1) It prevents anyone from getting hurt because the behavior is stopped before it gets out of hand. 2) It teaches the children to take control of themselves and their emotions before losing control.  I think it is a tactic I want to try but that means I need to make some changes in me for it to work.

In order to preemptively use time out as a calming tool you have to be tuned into your children at all times.  You have to watch for signs that your children are getting out of hand and stop the behavior before it happens.  When my children were babies, I was very tuned into their needs and was able to take care of their needs before they realized that they had them.  They were great babies because of this. I was able to know when they would be getting hungry and I fed them before they began to cry.  If they had a wet diaper, I usually changed it before they let me know it was uncomfortable.  If they had gas, I knew how to help them get rid of it and would often play with them in ways that would help them get rid of it before it became painful. 

But as they grew and became more independent, I stopped paying as much attention to them.  That is not to say that I neglect my children.  I have just been ready for them to take on more independence at each new stage.  Unfortunately, I have at times given them more independence than they can handle.  For instance, my youngest (age 6) looks up to her older sister quite a bit.  That means she wants to be around her all the time.  This it cute but not so cute to her sister.  When her sister does not give her the positive attention she craves, she gets her attention in negative ways by tormenting her.  If I can make myself catch her needing her sister’s attention before she starts tormenting her, then I can lessen the number of fights that they have. 

One thing that they often fight about is clothes.  My youngest thinks it is so wonderful to get hand-me-downs from her sister because that means she gets to dress like her.  The problem is that she has started wearing her sister’s clothes that I have not handed down to her yet and fights erupt when my oldest daughter realizes this.

Now that I know Michelle Duggar’s trick, I plan to take a more preemptive roll in my youngest daughter’s dressing to help reduce the fights.  I also plan to help my oldest daughter learn better ways to handle her frustration than throwing a tantrum.  How I plan to do that is next week’s topic.

Until then, thanks for reading and God bless.
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    Michelle Rasmussen

    A single mother herself, has learned how to successfully raise strong, self reliant children that are sure to be assets to society.

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