Last night I was in a bit of a funk because I was letting life get me down. But I was fortunate enough to have a conversation with a friend who gently let me know that I need to let go of some of my baggage from past relationships. More specifically my marriage but I know that I harbor baggage from other relationships as well. We all have baggage and that baggage can be very damaging to our relationships. I am not just talking about romantic relationships. Too much baggage can also damage friendships, relationships with parents or siblings, and even your relationship with your children. It really is not fair to the people around you when you allow the actions
of one person to create the reaction you chose with everyone else.
I remember a conversation that I had with my step dad the day before he died. I was expressing my frustration to him about the way my mother had been treating him during his last few weeks. And rather than jump on the band wagon or allow me to vent he stopped me and explained something to me about my mother that I had never realized before. He explained to me the baggage that she was carrying around caused her to fear a lot of things and when she lashed out on people it was her fear shining through. You see, he knew my mother better than
I ever hoped to know her and he loved her in spite of the baggage she carried that caused her to treat my step dad poorly. We are not all lucky enough to find someone as patient and understanding as my step dad so it is up to us to let go of our baggage in order to preserve all our other relationships in our lives.
I will be the first to admit that letting go of past hurts is not easy. But we have to do it anyway. Smiling through the pain is not easy, do it anyway. Learning to laugh again is not easy, do it anyway. Your children deserve the best you that you can be. This short excerpt from the Simple Truths book "One Choice" says it all.
One tree can start a forest,
One smile can begin a friendship,
One hand can lift a soul,
One word can frame the goal,
One candle can wipe out darkness,
One laugh can conquer gloom,
One hope can raise our spirits,
And...one choice can change your life.
Only you can chose to let go of your baggage and start living the life you deserve.
I want to hear from you. How have you learned to let go of your baggage in order to preserve all your other relationships?